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I AM SO

GRATEFUL

YOU ARE HERE

 
 
Let’s go live wider!
 
 
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I HOPE YOU FIND WHAT YOU NEED

who i am. (today)

I tell the truth, have the hard conversation and get excited about change. I listen to my heart and believe my gut.

I write poetry. Collect treasure. Make lists. I pray.

I get quiet. Sometimes I forget how important it is to get quiet. (And then life reminds me.)

I’ve done a lot of things for a paycheck that were like petting a cat from hindquarters to head. That is to say, wrong for me. I also found beautiful gifts in those misguided endeavors. Maybe they weren't so misguided.

My life is an art piece. (In that am consciously and constantly creating it. ...and sometimes it doesn't look so great!)

I have loved deeply. I have also divorced twice.

I am a mother. A single one. I have a son. He is spirited, sweet, difficult, strong-willed, smart and determined. He makes life exhausting. He makes life meaningful. Laying my hand on his back while he sleeps is one of my favorite things.

Spelling sucks. I like numbers, but they play tricks on me and add up differently every time. 

I want to know everything. I want to feel the spectrum. I am honest and kind. If nothing else, I am brave.

I believe in actually counting your blessings. I believe in setting goals and then hanging them up near the toilet. (Because, you know, read them often!) I believe in action and productivity. I love a to do list.

But it is important to go to bed on time. I believe in rest and patience too.

I like to go everywhere. The whole world is a gorgeous mansion that I call home. This planet is my country.

My empathy extends to all beating hearts. You are my people.

Being whole-hearted, open-hearted, vulnerable, bloody and raw- hearted is my religion.

Come with me.

Bigger, bolder, wilder and wider life awaits. Crack a whip and let’s get going!

I love you. 

 
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I am a fringe millennial who feels like an underachieving overachiever. And I am looking to untie that. Perfect balance is bullshit, but I believe there is a place (or a few places) between those two poles where I could find more compassion and fire. 

I have struggled with depression most of my life. I have often referred to myself as a “high functioning depressed person.” A shade of melancholy has been a constant companion, a common thread that I have almost always pulled along with me. There are times when the depression stiffens my joints and aches my bones, and there are more times when it is just a faint shadow that walks behind me. I am still working through and with and on this. It can be hard to look at. 

I am a survivor of domestic violence. I lived for a long time without taking a breath of real, fresh, breathable air. I have almost died - at the hand of another and by my own hand. I am still working through the shame. It’s really hard to look at. 

I am trying not to use the word “but” anymore. But it’s hard to stop!

 
 
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